Thursday, October 24, 2013

The Reset Button

It's early and I've been up for a few hours now... One of those morning when your mind is awake and alive, and running a million miles an hour.  My thoughts are turned to my kiddos.  The questions that run around in my head like:  "Are my kids getting the upbringing that they need to prepare them for life's challenges?"..."Are they loving their childhood and now teenage years?"... I remember so many things that I had as I was growing up, that have now become "fond memories" and even "anchors" in my life.  Do my kids have those?  When the winds of life blow, will they have a "center" to which they can return to clear away the clutter of life and start anew?  A core set of beliefs and values that anchor them in truth and unquestionable solid ground?  I know how I hit that "reset button" in my life and return my center, yet do they?  Things to assess and re-adjust if needed, yet my mind is awake with this line of questioning...
How do YOU hit your "reset button" in YOUR life?  I would love to hear from you!


  1. I think these are questions every parent asks. I'm constantly second guessing myself wondering if I'm giving them the tools they need to make it. As to how I "reset"... I turn everything off, radio, phone, daily planner and have some quality time. This always helps me put things in back perspective and re establish my priorities. This was a great read. Definitely made me look at things again.

  2. I wish I were better at hitting reset. I seem to let myself wait until I'm desperate and barely hanging on before I take a step back and identify what needs to happen. Sometimes the people around me have to help me do it. How do YOU hit reset, Matt? Would love to hear.

  3. Hello Matthew!
    First, let me say without judgment that I find your questions very legitimate because you need at this time to face so many things at once! : Your family life, promoting the movie "one shot", the output of your great music album "My awakening" with Brett Scherer ... and what we do not have to know (personal needs , desires, projects ... etc).
    Professionally, as part of my activity as an expert graphologist (Certified Graphology Applied to therapy), I used the in-depth analysis of handwriting (which provides a detailed interpretation of the personality into three poles: activity, intelligence (and not quality level), sociability) to the Council / Coaching staff by rélfexion on deep personality (the "strong" points, "work" of writers.
    I send you this feedback can be a path to re-start:
    By helping others in coaching graphology, I felt the need to be useful was essential and the non-satisfaction or psychological saturation was causing this feeling of not being engaged with events. It may be necessary to opt for a "let go" at least temporarily.
    Thus, rather than imagining all over again, perhaps it is sometimes less radical to find the meaning of his own contribution. For indeed, it is limited in time in our lives to do what we are asked or what the system requires us to lose sight of our ability to add interest and meaning. What can I make more? That is the question that turns the obstacle challenge that transcends to a new opening ... A motivated and different approach to the gear too pregnant to our present reality sometimes too heavy.
    When they explored this question, most of my clients have returned to their former life, but with a different look, a new capacity for action!

    I wish you much success as you deserve in return for your efforts in your work!
    Sincerely yours,


  4. It is something that is a part of ones core being, knowing when to 'reset'. My upbringing along with life experiences have shaped me. I know when something is truly wrong it disturbs the core part of me that knows and I am forced to look at what I need to do to eliminate the disturbance. Not always an easy thing to do.... As a mother doing all that I am able to ensure that my children will have that core or 'center', one that desires good, is perhaps my most important goal in life.

  5. Making sure our children are getting the upbringing they need in this crazy world will keep most parents up all night. They are faced with so many things. Are they really that different from 15-20 years ago? It seems like they are faced with the same things but at an earlier age at an alarming rate, a higher level of acceptability (doing drugs and having sex are the norm)with less accountability. Not to mention their busy schedules between school and after school activities. Life is crazy enough as an adult handling all the pressure. I can’t imagine how overwhelmed my children get.
    It is my responsibility to give them a place to turn to where they feel loved, safe, understood, and accepted. Home. Until they find what their center is, I create it for them. It’s there as soon as they walk through the door. Our children look to us as the example for everything. They are the ultimate behavior monitor for adults. Taking their cues from us on how to keep the world at bay and managing the stresses of life.
    Finding your center and the reset button. For some the two are different. Sometimes different situations call for different measures. For me it is hugging my children and hearing them laugh. I say off the wall things at random times. Of course my kids think I am nuts, specially my teenager. The other day out of nowhere I looked at her and said, “I think we need to buy a drum set.” The look on her face was priceless. “Mom, we don’t know how to play the drums.” She thinks I am just joking of course. “Not knowing how to play isn’t going to stop me from trying. Look around the room kid. We have learned to play the piano, guitar, and violin. I think the drums should be next. Why limit ourselves?” I pick up her electric acoustic guitar and make up a random and senseless song which she joins in on. Then we laugh at ourselves and we have forgotten the trivial things that bothered us that day.
    There are limitless possibilities to use as a reset button. I like to explore them all. Prayer/mediation, music, Qigong, Reiki, reading, a warm bubble bath, writing, and so much more. More importantly, I reset every day.
    “Yesterday’s the past, tomorrow’s the future, but today is a gift. That’s why it’s called the present.” Bill Keane
    Song choice-Little Wonders by Rob Thomas

  6. Mary Can on FaceBook (My answer)

    Yes , Matthew, teenagers need constant reference and crop with all the love that God wants us to deliver .

    Today, where are these markers and can give ?

    He is the father in the family which positions instead of everyone! Without necessarily knowing , without having to type the point on the table, it is he who establishes benchmarks and sets limits . God gave us the fathers, that moral authority and also spiritual !
    Unfortunately, even if we are physically present , we women , as a parent , sister, or aunt, sometimes taking the profile of the absent father , absorbed in his newspaper, his film and his rest ... leaving us crushed by this system ☹ !
    Then we may forget that we are in authority and therefore we can not assume !

    " Sometimes different situations call for different measures. "
    Daniel Roche Professor at the Sorbonne ( University of Paris Haute ) wrote that " the collapse of fathers stepping uncertainty son " (story of fathers and fatherhood ) . But what you succeeded as a father you have requested energy , courage and above all to be aware that it is your responsibility. Your commitment towards thy youth , like your love must be unconditional ...

    Sometimes they seem so safe, so determined , but it is only a facade ...
    In reality, they are still waiting to see how we react, you're right!
    Causing in us , they measure our stability. They seek in fact to identify themselves. For the girl, the father will help shape gradually her female identity , to confront this man look that give him confidence in it . For the boy, he will play the one he wants to look like a model ! And I think you can get to be the " tip " ( the perfect model ) of fathers Matt!
    For, indeed , it is true that our teenage father wants to meet ! Not a man who got to always be right but still , a man who does weight! Not a father for fear of conflict , passes everything but a father aware of his limits while being intensely present , attentive and demanding !
    Adolescents need a model that face , at first , but which it will comply thereafter, a model of strength and gentleness , a model of masculinity and tenderness and most steadfast ... you seem like the be , through all your artistic works.

    God's will ...
    In answering the deepest yearnings of our young by our commitment to limit them, we fulfill the mission that God has entrusted to us as qu'aduultes men and women , fathers and mothers , brothers or sisters etc ...
    Praying for our teens , do not forget to ask God to make us sensitive to their needs and respond with knowledge about .

    If we have forgotten what it is like to be a father , we have an excellent landmark: let us remember that the Lord Jesus showed us " FATHER " in ALL All characters of Father were seen in the person of Jesus Christ and a reading of the Gospel in this way is of great benefit Matthew . ☺
    Reflecting ourselves characters Christ, we will take our place as father to serve our family.

  7. About 7 years ago I almost died in a fatal car crash two days before my birthday. Remembering my thought of how I could not say goodbye to anyone and really thought this is it- you just hve to have faith and be ready to go Home to God.. You realize the only thing you are taking with you is the love anyone every gave you and the memory of loving them. Everything else in yhe world and every problem you thought was worth your time or worry is completely meaningless. The only thing that matters is love and loving others around you. So that day of almost dying is my reset button for sure.



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