Tuesday, December 20, 2016

Words Matter (more than we may know)!

I have been up most of the night thinking.  Sometimes the mind is racing and is naturally trying to sort through the "happening of recent days", and put them in their proper mental places (for me)...
To me, this is a process of looking for truth!  If I, or someone else is not in line with the truth, then it feels so out of place to me.  I have to look at it, and see where its not true, or if it IS true, and I'm not aligned with the truth, then I need adjust myself to align and recognize fault, correct myself, and ask forgiveness for not upholding the truth.

I was reminded of a book, "The Four Agreements" where the author (Don Miguel Ruiz) illustrates 4 simple agreements (or rules) on which we should base the rest of our lives.  One of these agreements was "Be Impeccable with Your Word"...the book proceeds to show how our words can be "black magic" and gives good examples of how small things that are said, can have long lasting effects on people; and cause hurt and pain in ourselves and others.
Words can also be "white magic" and establish strong supports and beliefs in ourselves and others.  When our words are true, then they only support and build up the overall fabric of life.
Either way.... Words do matter!

Most people think this is pretty "black and white" in nature.  That they tell a lie or don't tell a lie.  Well, that's a first graders' way of looking at it, and certainly where it begins, but it does go deeper!  I see three levels that deserve a look.

1st level... A "Lie" or "Not a Lie"
2nd level... Are your words supportive or destructive to others?  Do the things you say hurt or help others? Most mean things that are said (the "black magic spells"), are said in the fit of anger or emotionally charged situations.  Even though apologies might be offered.  The lasting effect(s) of what was said does not go away so easily.  If apologies are made, yet behavior doesn't change, then it can get worse and escalate into a third level...
3rd level... The story you tell YOURSELF after saying something mean as to why you said it,.. is what you said true or not true?  Is that person REALLY what you called them or accused them of?  (this one is much more difficult to sort through!)  A process of asking if your own perspective is true or not true?  Much harder to decipher (I think).

How does one really know if their words are casting "dark spells" or not?   I think the easiest way to answer that is to look at your own life right now.  Evaluate your own "Emotional Net Worth".  The net worth in the financial world is the value of your money and assets minus your financial liabilities and debts...whatever is net (or left over) is your net worth.  Look at that on an emotional level.  Is your current emotion net worth filled with assets or liabilities?  Hmmmm!!  Good question!  Maybe look behind you too (metaphorically speaking)  Is your past filled with a wake of disaster and destruction?  or of emotionally rewarding assets?  Taking ownership of where you are now vs where you've been is important to do on a regular basis.

The truth of where you are right now,...is a direct reflection of what YOU have believed, the words YOU have said, what YOU have done, and the choices YOU have made!

If your life (or even a part of your life) is in shambles, maybe you should stop and look at yourself?!  Evaluate what YOU do to contribute to that outcome, and make necessary changes that lead to the life you DO want.  It's hard though!  To look past the hurtful things said, see what's yours' to correct, and what is not yours' at all.  What's true and deserves correction, and what's NOT true and should not be allowed into your own mental blueprint.  Release what isn't yours'!!....and do not let mean things said to you (or of you) grow to being part of your own belief about yourself.

On the flip side...our words can be powerful in contributing to the overall value of life.  Think of positive words that were once said to you, or you read,.. that you'll never forget.  Think of how they changed you and became anchors in your life, on which you have relied in difficult times.  Words can support, or they can certainly tear down too.

Oh how the words we say have lasting effect (especially with children!)!!

"In the beginning, there was the word, and word was with God"... God Is Love!!  Hopefully our words can be as well!

Tuesday, November 29, 2016

What's YOUR measuring stick...?

You wake in the morning, and you do your morning routine.  You get ready for your day and I'll bet you (like most people these days) log into a social media outlet and start to see what "cool" looks like today.  The amazing body we should have, the house we should be living in, the style of clothes we are supposed be buying, the cars we should be driving, and what the perfect continual state of "being in love" looks like.
The take away from such a daily experience is:  "Wow, look at how short I fall of what I (and my life) "should be".

Occasionally, however, we see things that knock some sense into the warped social media perception that resonate with reality, and allow us to wake up a bit.  Such is what happened to me this morning as I had the exactly morning that I have just explained.  It was someone (whom I have never met) that posted the following:
Life measured through social media (such a limited manipulated filter) consisting of mostly strangers that we have never met.  Why do we do it?

Now I don't think there is anything wrong with using these images to inspire or motivate ourselves...  (kind of like a "vision board")  However, when it's looked at in the light of exposing our own lack and the LACK thereof is what receives our energy?  I believe that can be very unhealthy for our own mental and emotional state.  If we focus on lack, then what will grow..?  Lack!  Yet, if these images are used to inspire us to climb higher, yet not forgetting the good that we ALREADY are and already HAVE... then it can be extremely healthy in that specific light.  #perspective
The measuring sticks that we use these days (social media, and even religious demands on what "perfect" is supposed looks like) and the unbelievable ways that they cause us to feel "less than"..."unworthy"..."sinners"...  I think this can certainly work in ways that cause more harm than good!  How can we possibly measure ourselves with "perfection"?

Instead, why don't we just identify what we want, get excited about our own lives, then give it our best?!  As we progress toward what WE want, then we can measure each day with our OWN measuring stick?  Are we progressing from last month to this current month?  Sometimes it's hard to see progress day by day (because bad days DO come along for us all)...but look back 6 moths, a year, a couple of years.

"Years know things that days never knew"
       ~ Gordon C. Peters

Are we generally working toward our personal goals and doing our best?
What's the overall trend of your life from a year ago?  Doing better?  Worse?  The same?  Are we so concerned with what we're not, that it's causing us to miss out on what actually "IS"and who we ARE...?!?!?!  Who cares if you don't have the same life as others!  You have YOURS'!... and you really can simply focus on what you are and what IS!  Everyday just LIVE and be grateful, and life all of a sudden become pretty damn Awesome!  The more one focuses on what they do have in their life, the more what they have does grow.
(Hmmmm... think on that one a bit ;)

You do YOU!  Live and Let Live!!  yet let's STOP comparing ourselves to people we don't even know!

Very interested in your thoughts which I do invite them all!

Thursday, November 24, 2016


Thanksgiving Day...

A day that most across the country, experience the traditions of gathering with those they love.  Breaking bread, bowing their heads and giving 'Thanks' to God, for the blessings of life.  This originates back to the pilgrims in 1621 when their first corn harvest was successful. The first thing they wanted to do was gather in the spirit of thanksgiving, and celebration for the successful harvest.  

President Lincoln was the president that officially designated "Thanksgiving Day" as a national holiday in 1862.  At the height of the Civil War, in a proclamation entreating all Americans to ask God to “commend to his tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife” and to “heal the wounds of the nation.”

I imagine that the "wounds of the nation" were quite significant!  The nation was in full fledged war!  Lives were being lost, families were divided in their allegiance to either The North or The South, and to have a leader (in the midst of a war) that was present enough to call on the nation and ask all to join in the spirit together in the spirit of prayer and giving thanks... To me, this is remarkably present and an absolute display of awakened awareness.  

What energetically happens when we pause and give thanks?  Is there truly an energetic shift?  Image what would happen if we (as an entire nation) did this!  The acknowledgment and thanksgiving for that which is good and abundant... and letting go of the woes, differences, and problems of life.  Even if it's for only but a day.  When you do this...does a seed of hope somehow find it's way into your heart and mind?  As you think of your blessings, even the most basic of blessings (shelter, food, health, family, friends, and even your God given breath) do the emotional walls that we have begin to feel like they're coming down?  Often times we don't see these walls and experience the "coming together" until someone is gone.  How often do we hear (in those moments) that "I should have forgiven them while I had the chance"... "Why didn't I reach out to them before they were gone, to mend the fence between us?" ... Is it too late to bow our heads, and reach out to those we hold at a distance, and wave the olive branch of peace?  

Love can only bring others together...
Ego is what creates the distance and emotional division...

I am not unaware of circumstances where it's best to walk away from others, in the light of not being in a toxic situation any longer...  However, if you find yourself leaving others behind...think long and hard before you do...and if you still decide it's best to part ways...then do so with gratitude.  Thanking them for the stepping stone that they were in your life.  No doubt you were a stepping stone for them too,..so both could learn and grow and be able to move to their next personal level.

I don't think it's coincidence, that we are instructed in prayer, to give thanks first.  It brings us to a knee in the light of humility.  The more we thank and acknowledge the blessings granted to us, the more the ego dies and the seeds of hope and happiness begin to emerge from inside us.  "The seeds of sorrow can not take root in a grateful heart"... Paul George.

May we truly give thanks (not just eat turkey) as we gather with loved ones today.  May we all try to offer the olive branch to someone that has been estranged, yet we still love and would be devastated if they were gone for good.  Make that attempt to decrease the distance with those that are estranged...  
and may we relish in those that ARE with us and we hold dear on this special day of Thanksgiving!  

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!! God Bless us all :)


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