Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Are we "Keepers"..?

Simplify simplify simplify... That is what my mind keeps telling me these days. Over the years I have tried to rid my life of that which causes havoc and grief, and keep those things which spawn goodness and pleasure. Now, that doesn't mean to throw out anything that doesn't go my way, and keep whatever has a bow wrapped around it. However I have put much thought into that line which is pretty undefined. Where does one draw that line? That decision between keeping or letting go...(a job, a situation, or perhaps even a person)

“The way to find out about happiness is to keep your mind on those moments when you feel most happy, when you are really happy — not excited, not just thrilled, but deeply happy. This requires a little bit of self-analysis. What is it that makes you happy? Stay with it, no matter what people tell you. This is what is called following your bliss.”

:Joseph Campbell

As I've analyzed that question, I have also asked myself whether or not I am the kind of person that people would want to keep around. Do I, in fact, add to the lives of others? Do I bring value to an equation? Valid questions for I believe they go hand in hand. If I am to hope for value; then I must ask whether or not I am VALUable enough to have value returned unto me. Am I a keeper?:). Am I a producer or am I only apt to take, that which is produced by another?
The law of attraction is one of BEING that which we ask the universe to return unto us...
Am I BEING? Not "have I been" (for that indicates the past)...But RIGHT NOW... Am I BEING the type of person that i want to attract? Do I merit that which I seek? Or am I sitting back full of entitlement..?

I suppose that before we let something go in our lives, we should analyze ourselves first... Sometimes it's ok to let things go their way...away from us. Yet others we SHOULD hold onto, even when it's difficult... for they add to and beautify life...

Hard line to draw... So I would say I wanted to share (and invite comments on) two thoughts... When is it better to let things go? And analyze if I (you as the reader) am someone that others should let go of...or do I add to life as a whole to be counted as a "KEEPER"....? :)


  1. The question I ask myself before I let something go is this...Does holding onto this help me be a better person and be the "real" me? Or am I pretending to be someone I'm not because I am holding on to it? I no longer pretend. I own my feelings and if I am reacting to someone or something in a way that makes me feel fake, then I let it go.

    And I strive every day to be the best "me" I can be. I try to make the best out of every situation I can, at work, at church, and at home. I try to raise my 4 kids to do the same...add to society do not detract, be a strong individual but not over-bearing, be understanding and empathetic but do not allow others to take advantage of you, be happy and optimistic even when things are hard, work hard but have fun =)

  2. I really like how thought provoking this post is. :) Because it brings up a lot of questions of whether or not we believe we are valuable/worthy of being in other people's lives. And I agree with Cozy above that when it comes times to make these kinds of decisions it really boils down to us. Are we being our authentic selves, is what we are doing bringing out the best in us, or is what we are doing what we are truly committed (because sometimes those don't always align perfectly). And what does it really mean to be a 'keeper'?! We are all keepers in our own eyes and in the eyes of others, but who are we being kept by? Really only ourselves. If we like ourselves then what's to question. When I like myself there really are no questions because me liking me is more important than anything because of anyone, I have to live with myself every day.

    Just for your writing you are definitely a keeper!

  3. Being a keeper is harder to answer than letting go, or perhaps not...I think we often analyse our lives through the eyes of other people, which mostly turn our to be dissapointing. Or through the eyes of ourselves which can be very bias be is to the possitive ore negative. I have recently tried to evaluate my value of being a keeper through God's eyes. I can tell you that is much more daunting! The difference is though that He looks through love and shows us in love what to change in order to be pleasing to Him. And suddenly whilst I was focusing on pleasing Him I now have more value in the eyes of others...strange? Not at all, for scripture reads that He will give us honor in the eyes of man! But above all He created each one of us to be keepers we just sometimes need some help in order to be all that we can be! Now letting go, oh boy! I strongly agree that if something is letting you lose your shine and sparkle, stealing your joy, let go! If you are still able to find joy in a difficult situation or stille sparkle when the going gets tough, then hold on, and hold out because somewhere underneath the mess something is making you shine!

  4. I thank you Cozy, Kelly, and Chrisna...for your comments. Each of your' perspective has been so very valuable to me as you've shared.
    The idea of asking (as Cozy said pertaining to letting go or keeping) does holding into this help me be a better person and be the "real" me?...
    Awesome perspective! Loved that!!!

    Kelly..."but who are we being kept by?...really only ourselves"... This is so great for me to read!

    Chrisna... "[God] created us to be keepers"... Wow! The reminding influence of the truth is something you helped me see again. Thank you!!

    I feel blessed and privileged that you women, and your amazing minds have helped be a part of this forum... I thank you once again!!

  5. I LOVE Chrisna's comment!

    It's always good to be reminded that I need to evaluate myself to ascertain whether I give back to society (or a relationship), or am I constantly taking? One wise woman once said "there are two kinds of people in this world, givers and takers". That really stuck with me. I've tried to apply that to my relationships. Which one am I? Do I enrich life or make it a drudgery. I've made up my mind that being the right person and seeing what I can give to the relationship is much better than being a "taker". I'd like to think of myself as a "keeper" but I guess one can never truly know.

    As for knowing who to let go, I've still not figured that one out but this post has made me think about it.

    Thanks for the transparency, you really know how to get one to thinking!

  6. As humans we often hold on to things that gives us happy memories or makes us remember what we have overcomed of quests. But sometimes we are holding on to some things, that might not be as well for us as we think, and when is it time to let go... tough one...
    I believe letting things go might gives us the possibility to have room to receive something new, the trick is to know the right time.
    Honesty to yourself as a person, your believe and the love to and from the ones around you will often be the right guidance for this step in live, that might happen nore than one time;)

    So the best time to let go is... when you feel it is the right time, when it is time to have a change, that will make you a happier and better person or let you evovle towards the person you feel you want to be.

    Am one a Keeper..... I believe we are all keepers... for a reason we are all on this magical place called Earth brought to it with a task, unknown to the most of us.
    Through the road of life figuring out why we are here, what might be our purpose, we entcounter people that changes us or we might change them, by an act of honesty, kindness or just a happy smile to brighten up a strangers life for a second.

    So in that perspective we are all important - we are all Keepers.

    I usually never comment on any blogs, but yours made me start thinking, thank you - and for that you are a keeper ;)

  7. I loved this post. And I love Joseph Campbell.

    Campbell felt things happened in our lives for reasons. Whether divinely guided
    or self-....selected, I agree. Some people come and go, some stay for a long
    time. What causes that? Is it destiny? Chance?

    "If the errors of my life have profited me one truth it is this....: Believe.
    Believe in your destiny and the star from which it shines. Believe as if you are
    an arrow pulled from God's own bow. This is the single trait that the great of
    the universe have all shared.... Believe as if your life depended upon it. For
    indeed, it does."

    I choose to believe there is a larger plan and purpose at work. If only in sync
    with the very smallest parts that make up our bodies and souls and minds. I
    think if you get really quiet and let yourself envision your future, you get
    glimpses of the roles others are meant to play. If any. I think something inside
    you knows.

    So it's getting in touch and being true to that part inside of you, that is
    important. Trusting it. Trusting yourself. Trusting life. That's when decisions
    can be made with confidence. Even if painful. Even if others will be hurt.
    Because you can see your path clearly. You can lead.

    Simplify. Cast out that which causes confusion. Confusion is a fruit of negative
    things. Not alway easy to do. But it happens on its own time. Qui sera, sera.
    What will be, will be.

    Do you add? Are you a keeper? You have added, to me. I think the measure of our
    value is aligned with how deeply we love others. We know when and why we do. If
    our hearts are pure and we have that love for them, we are keepers indeed.

    It's not been easy for me, ever, to let go of things that aren't working. I want
    to fix them! I do believe there are times we have to bow our head, release our
    hold, and walk away. Likewise there are times to keep holding on. What's most
    important is that you know your reasons, either way. There is no guarantee of
    success or happiness. So what is the principal of the matter? And how do you
    really feel about it inside? What do you really want? How can you put yourself
    in a position for miracles to happen?

    These are complicated issues, these matters of the heart. When one has many
    options, only the harder.

    I believe Campbell would say there are roles people are meant to play in our
    lives. I also don't think he'd expect us not to know in every part of our being
    who our life partner(s) were meant to be. As I remember he believed in
    recognition. Even, instantaneous.

    I know it doesn't always happen that way. And who knows how it will happen, for
    me. But what a sweet thing when it does, and how sweet to both feel there is no
    place you'd rather be. Time doesn't matter anymore because you are with the
    "right" person. You know you aren't missing, anything.

    Letting go is so hard. I've found it easier if I force myself, somehow. Put
    things in place to not go back. Or, to not go anywhere else, if I decide to
    stay. Slowly, life changes and I look back and see it was right for me. That
    somewhere inside I was making choices that were right for me.

    We only live once. How can we make our world a better place? Ourselves the best
    we can be? Others great, as well? How do you want to have lived? Why?

    Millions of people are asking themselves the same questions. I truly believe we
    have the answers somewhere inside each of us.


  8. Wow!!! So, I had to read this one a few times, of course each time I interpreted it differently. I also took my time processing my perspective on simplifing and letting go.
    I think that we all have a natural instinct that tells us what is right for us and what is not. We tend to let our heads and hearts override it. It's the final decision to let something go that is difficult, not the knowing when. It is also the fear of what "may happen" if we let go of that job, situation, or person. The expereince of loss is some thing everyone wants to avoid. Then there is the deeper level of letting life naturally take its course. When it is time it will present itself.

    "Some of the greatest battles you will face, will be fought within the silent chambers of our own soul."
    Ezra Taft Benson

    We never really know what we bring into the lives of others. If we operate with the intent of treating people with love and compassion, offer help and guidance, or inspiration and clarity; then how do we not bring value. To question our value puts out to the universe that we have self doubt about ourselves which seems to go against the law of attraction. What I have observed in my own life is that the more positive I am through thought and action, the more positive things happen in my life. It's not to say I don't have moments of doubt, I just don't stay in that place for long.

    "Those who know they don't know
    Gain wisdom.
    Those who pretend to know
    Remain ignorant.

    Those who acknowledge their weakness
    Become strong
    Those who flaunt their power
    Will lose it."
    Tao Te Ching

  9. It is best to let things go when a) the situation is toxic and there is nothing that can be done to make it better. You've tried everything you could to make things work. I guess the prime example would be a relationship and this could be family, friends, or love interest. But it seems in this situation that possibly you have tried to change yourself because you really do care about the relationship but really it might be the other person that is causing the negatives. B) Given the situation, sometimes you cannot let go but only to accept the situation. While we might not want to, we have no choice. But to accept is to understand.

    This keeper question is different. Are you a keeper? How do you answer that question when you don't know someone but only through the words that they write. I would say maybe. Based on what you have write, I think you aid people to think deeper into their minds in discovering their mind, self, world around them, etc. Not too many people think this way these days. For this, I can bet you're a good listener and friends/family trust you to discuss their weaknesses in life. Your glass is half full. So yes, you're a keeper.
    ( BTW, I think I'm the only person in months who has posted. I wonder...)


    PART 1
    We are the " Keepers "? I would say that we are for ourselves and for all those who are able to conmprendre and share unconditional LOVE that God has given us.
    An occasional glance on our inner nature will certainly not a big difference if we do not take it seriously or not grow . Recognition of what God has given us , we continue to provide the force required to break the tendency to see ourselves as one thing, but to be aware of the unique being that we can become ! We are thus able to produce a real charity in us even if we are aware of what we really are looking ...

    To do this, we must first get to know ...
    Personally I help others by graphology and characterology but being Minister of Worship, by FAITH, and teaching it.

    Who am I? " Here's a simple question, but essential , I ask myself regularly. (Effect of quarantine? ... LOL maybe) .
    This is the only question in the world that anyone other than ourselves can answer. The answer is of fundamental importance and the solution will not come from examining our passport or a glance in the mirror.

    Currently , many of us live in a state of confusion and disorder , and searching for meaning in their lives. We spend a lot of time and effort to our material interests and often do not find time to take care of our SPIRITUAL INTEREST .
    There are individuals with an oversized ego , pretentious, and having a very high opinion of themselves . Their "self" bloated pushes them to flaunt their talents , knowledge and noble image they have of themselves. At the other extreme is the person who has herself a very negative image . If it needs to answer the question " Who am I?" , His answers will denote a feeling of total worthlessness .
    Another category of people is the individual HUMBLE ENOUGH THAT BELIEVES IN GOD. Everything he does in his life, he attributed solely to the use of his inner potential. IT DOES NOT denigrated , NOR MINIMIZE THE GIFTS AND TALENTS WITH THE CREATOR HAS PROVIDED . I 'm trying to like this last one. Because the spiritual being , is seen more as a craftsman , considers his talents only as instruments and devotes all his attention to his BUILDING PERSONAL AND HE KNOWS THAT: EVERYONE IS A WORLD IN ITSELF . It would be tragic to miss the beauty and splendor of the special world of each of its unique qualities and energies. Only we can live our lives and nobody else . Ask " Who am I?" gives everyone the clarity and momentum needed to become who he really is .


    PART 2


    Questions arise ?

    * What is to be rich if we do not know or do not want to share?
    > Love is doing in his agape ( love that can fill us and ask nothing in return: for example, when we provide children around us gifts knowing they can not make us , this is the TRUE LOVE! )

    * What is wanting to learn if we want to forget and move on to something else?
    > When we learn, we learn by mistake, like when we were children and we fell many times before you can walk ... whatever falls, we must continue to move forward ... That is the REAL VICTORY , to have the COURAGE tO CONTINUE !

    * What is to amass treasures are perishable ?
    > Those who see only the material value of things and make a lawsuit in their lives, often miss the fulfillment of things much more value , because they are not guided by FAITH.
    Yet God gives us the necessary keys in his word to be able to penetrate our other desires that unbelievers are eagerly pursuing .
    THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THINGS DO NOT SEE : Bridge on a glance to see what you have in your heart , Matthew ? Can you imagine seeing a beautiful car you drive behind this outward sign of wealth , which is hidden in your heart is much bigger compared to everything you do, has done and will do for your family for example ... NOT THESE THINGS THERE IS NOT SEE BUT ARE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL .


    Here is what Jesus said :

    Matthew 6:19-21 Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth , where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break through and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven , where moth and rust do not destroy , and where thieves do not break through nor steal. For where your treasure is there will your heart be .

    Here is what Paul told Timothy
    1 Timothy 6:17-19 that are rich in this present world not to be arrogant , and not put their trust in uncertain riches, but on God , who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment . That they do good, to be rich in good works , for liberality , generosity , and thus raise the future treasure placed on a solid foundation to enter LIFE TRUE.


    PART 3



    As to question because we realize through his experiments that we must improve, it is neither manqer not self-confidence , but be clear about the fact that some things in we may need to be improved, the better, because we are constantly evolving ...

    However, if we saw it as a betrayal towards self and only to please , it is not advisable , because the goal is not to " please others " but to feel better with yourself ET more ...

    Otherwise go into a sort of "mold" because it's better to be accepted , loved , and that what is sought is the approval of others , it does not work , there is disagreement ourselves also ... the aim being to readjust but consistent with itself, and in harmony with others as much as possible .. this is what I understood for myself .. and applied , as I have ...

    Anyway, our experiences shape us , make you change , but if our gaze is riveted only on what others are saying and how they love us best , the most , so it can be a way to lose too ... when to be "faithful" to behaviors that seem harmful to some of our relationships and negative for others, it can be quite cultivate goal of trying to better understand why this one is not to agree to a compromise.

    The only compromise I do not, it is those of my FAITH, because:
    "If God is for us, who can be against us ? " Romans 8 : 31

    Then , as I said above , I think it's all in exchange for true LOVE.
    For example, if you welcome someone to your house for a meal or accommodation , which will remove earnings, temporary resident, certainly but YOU, MUCH MORE ....




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